Our Laos Top Ten List

From Pakse, Tadlo, 4,000 Islands; Laos

If we could change anything about Laos, it would be us.  We'd be able to speak the language.  Daily, we've had questions we haven't been able to get clear answers to (thankfully, 'toilet' is pretty universal).  Speaking Laos would give us the ability to share more of our lives beyond the ever interesting and inviting, "sabaidee (hello)" and "kap jai (thank you)".  That being said, not speaking the language, and being a carrier of English, has led to some great moments.  In this spirit, we put together a top 10 list of sorts, our top 10 awkward or funny or noteworthy moments in Laos.  Some are funny, some aren't, but we have really enjoyed this country.

10.  Laos people lucky enough to learn English have a hunger to practice with native speakers.  You can count on three questions:  How old are you?  Are you married?  And, where are you from?  Braver conversants dip into deeper waters.  Like the time Jenn went to the bathroom while we were waiting at the public bus station and two Laos men swooped in and sat on either side of me, curious about what I was reading, and wanting to read with me.  This lead to a two hour Laos-English and English-Laos practice session with Shing, a 20-something Lao man with marginal English and a great smile.  One could say a handsome smile.  At least that is where the conversation went, him telling me that I was handsome (after complementing Jenn's beauty) and that he was not, and me telling him that he was indeed a handsome man.  In Laos, this type of conversation felt almost normal.

9.  A Can of Spite (No Malice Please).  In Luang Prabang, we stopped to have an afternoon refreshment with some friends we made in Thailand (we've bumped into them 3 or 4 times now, which has been a kick).  Jenn ordered a Sprite, but the waiter didn't understand.  She pointed to the menu and said "Sprite" again.  When the waiter saw the menu, he knew what she was after, the ever-elusive can of "Spite" written on the menu (from which he had learned the term).  He corrected her, and she enjoyed her drink.  

8.  Our guesthouse in Vang Vieng had some of the best food we've had.  The cook was amazing.  One of the dishes was "vegetables and chicken ass".  We're not quite sure what was lost in translation.  I ordered it.  Actually, I had Jenn order it for me.  But she just asked for chicken.  We'll never know if we got the ass.

7.  Labored conversation leads to a variety of questions.  One Lao man, at the travel shop in Champasak, a small one-road town, asked us why our skin was white.  We didn't have a good answer.  'Why' is a good question: judging from our skin's sun-kissed redness, it can be considered a sub-optimal design.

6.  Everywhere we've gone, people have giggled at us.  Maybe its our Western-ness, or our goofy smiles.  We will likely never know.  But we will always remember the friendly "Sabaidees" that accompany just about every giggle (and every interaction).

5. While on Don Khon, on of the 4,000 Islands in Southern Laos, we went to see the endangered, freshwater Irrawaddy dolphins in the Mekong River (Jenn was glowing, it was awesome...we saw a possibly the entire population that is left).  Before going out, we passed an hour or so waiting a local family restaurant/house so that we could be on the river at the best time.  In this hour, we realized that one of our bikes had a flat tire, which equaled a long walk home, at least partly in the dark.  We left our bikes at the restaurant at the urging of the matriarch (no locks necessary on the entire island) and came back to find two of the brothers finishing repairs on the tire.  They just did it to help out, not expecting any money...just one human helping out another.  Their faces lit up when we gave them a tip, as bright as ours lit up when we realized what they hand done.  Best of all, from what we've gathered, this type of experience is not unique to us.

4.  Keeping the high five alive. One of our best (and most painful days) was spent biking to the major waterfall outside of Luang Prabang.  Most people end up taking a tuk-tuk, but we decided to ride the 35 or so kilometers on painfully adjusted mountain bikes.  It gave us both fantastic views of the area and incredibly sore crotches.  On the way, school children (out for lunch) insisted on giving us ride-by high fives.  It was like we were in a road race with fans lined up and/or cycling to cheer us on.  This was quintessential Laos.

3.  Its okay, we have stools.  We have learned to never expect anything.  Not once have we had a predictable travel experience.  One of our favorite guest house hosts (with a tremendous laugh and jovial spirit) had booked a bus for us to travel from Champasak to Don Khong (in the 4,000 Islands).  He was there when we boarded our VIP bus to find that no seats were available.  His answer...."it's okay, no problem, we have chair".  Jenn and I weren't exactly smitten with the response, as this put us on foot tall wooden stools in the aisles (next to the driver).  Turns out, our guy was right, it was just fine...it actually even gave us a better view.

2.  While in Vang Vieng, Jenn and I managed to sink our kayak in the river.  After 40 minutes of skillful navigation, with Jenn and the front and the captain in the back, our boat started to feel wobbly.  Jenn thought I was screwing off, which I was at the beginning, but I relayed that something felt off.  "Use your core!" was her response (evidently I had forgotten how to balance in the past five minutes).  She turned around to find me sitting in water, we got the giggles, capsized and found out that the ever important plug at the rear of the boat was missing.  Our Laos guides loved it.  We had taken on a half boat full of water.  I'm still working on my core.

1.  We've seen some interesting travel safety in both Laos and Thailand...whole families on motorcycles, dresser drawers with the driver using one hand to hold them down.  But this one takes the cake:  motorcycle, one woman driving, the other sitting side-saddle holding on to nothing but her 3-year old son and the IV drip inserted into his arm.  Not a twinge of worry on any of their faces.

So there you have it, a more or less top ten list from our month in Laos.  There are so many more.  Tomorrow, we are off to Cambodia.  Thank you Laos for a fantastic visit.